I must heal all of everything, all of them, rounded up in separate places all at once. Cake.

Mmm, humming a lullaby about greasy trolls while searching for frogs in mid-air. Did you notice the crayon-like pearls down my cheeks? Cheating, avoiding, hide and seek within a tree. Branches of messy thoughts and love. Love, only love, for your chopped-off fingers. Blood blood blood as far as the lashes can bend. Du ville mig aldrig ont, ingenting ville du mig. Det är din värld och ingen annans din jävel. Åh sånt djävulskap vi kan råda utan rådgivning. Jag ska mala ner mig i en koffert av murket  mört trä sedan låta den halvögde piraten skicka mig till Island. Island the island of islands. But most of all, I would like to knit you a cozy winter sweater for those stormy times we occasionally come across.

In my lonesome fearless mind, I thought it would be sweet to meet. Meet, at your schoolyard by the fire-hydrant at fruit-break hour.
I think you have forgotten me by now though, you illusionist mind.

You don't have to entertain me= I'm cool with my own thoughts.

Calm down you scattered restless girl,
unbuckle your thoughts on being something else than you were supposed to be. 
Something and someone you already are.
In the most foggy state of mind, clarity awakes.
In a way, and possibly the most spectacular,
you'll find me fully and completely swarming with bravery.
Look inside my head and you'll see.





- Oh my sweet sweet candy stripe, you are one ugly fucker.

I found empathy from madness.

Svårare än så ska det väl inte vara? 
sa verkligheten med sanningen instämmande.
Dina ord klingar ju så fint mot trumhinnan lilla vän,
du får vandra dig vilsen pojke lilla för du hör inte hemma.
Följ hämndens repetitioner och du ska klara dig så klarast.
Klara klarar allt.
Men täck förbövelen ditt hjärta tätt så tätt för Ingen sa Inget får Dig beröra.

Outforskad mark trassliga terränger,
jag försöker hitta fotfäste i något som inte Är.
Ibland glömmer jag hur svårt allting faktiskt var.
Förebrå mig icket,
låt mig dansa
nu.

GET YOUR HANDS UT OF THE FREEZER,
I want to set them on fire.

We are all ugly you know. Beautiful worthless beings.

Utomordentligt grått är det nu. Lugnet vilar.
Rösten är dov, den avdunstar i ekot.

Ge mig ord av skönhet i utbyte mot något verkligt. Eller tvärtom.
Knyt upp knutarna vid anknytning och släpp ner håret, det skulle göra Dig gott.
Säg mig ditt namn baklänges medan du tar min hand i en vals.
Dansa in livet i mig, håll mig hårt intill, kapitulerande långt ifrån avgrunden.

Om du fanns, skulle du låta mig få vila i dina armar?
Jag är likt den kulör du finner i platsen runt ögats svarta mitt.

Got some seaweed growing out of my eye-socket

I do not wish for happiness. I wish only too feel the glorious wonder of being alive.

The Cleanest Toilet In The World

A warmhearted feeling from the tiniest memory, buried so deep. We shared only the music and creative work of others. We replaced our story with theirs, we were never meant to have our own. You could never see me with your own eyes, hear my words, listen to my forgiveness. I thought I could carry your weakness the way you should have carried mine, given me the shelter, guidance, I needed so. All that is left of you now is kept away somewhere deep inside. Lost.
I will forever keep the lightness of your being in my heart.

Paper paper obsolete. I thought you'd ask me not to leave.

Look at my fingertips, they are touching your forehead. 

No more, no longer any sparkling emerald green arches surrounding the pace of your words. 

Forever and ever in absolute hunger. Thirsting for air.

Far far away from this hole of growling midgets.

Oh, look at that. I just slapped your blushing cheek.

Now,

Weep.

Sweet stuff from the top of the pop-tarts. Here's something for you to chew my friend.

I'm playing hard-to-get with anger. A new do and a new pair of feet please so I can keep climbing the ladder of awesomeness. I'm extraordinary in all forms of crap.


"I come bearing forgiveness 
 Only love, only love
 even if it's not enough"

Words may wound but silence breaks the heart.

Uncontrollable movements through the tip-toes, 

dance with me through the ugliness of complete abnormality.

The way sincerity twists is not for the faint-hearted.

"

Oh if you knew what it meant to me

Tomorrow is the day of destruction, the end of all that it could be.
Swarming dust and fog to put my mind at ease.
There is no cruelty in endings.
It is not shallow or fleeting.
It is pure and bare for the ones who feel it,
It is not for you.

Unrequited belonging can turn into destruction of a barren soul.
I am to be part of someone else now.



All of the unspeakable things
I'm searching.

A kid called, Panic!

Vila dina arma händer i mina
Gräv ner dina vita knogar i min hud
Rista in din ondska på min bröstkorg,
låt den få vila där och sjunka in i mitt genomskinlig skinn
Låt kylan i dina ord svalka i min värme
för den är outgrundlig, bottenlös, utan skörhet.

Undress me and lighten my burden

In i skogens jordiska vrå ska vi skapa en plats åt alla de ensliga själar. 

Svart sot ska fördöma inkräktare, förbarma de ihåliga vraken.

De öppna såren ska vi rispa upp tills de får läkas av jorden och regnet. 

Här ska bara dem starka vara, dem som lever så genomsyrande nära, 

nära allt det obetydligt svåra och underbara. 

Aldrig ska solen få mörkna vårt skinn eller lämna avtryck. 

Det ska vara den vackraste av platser. 

- Just shot myself in the head. Unexpected weird stuff came out the other end.

.

I am the one who dwells in the forest. But I'm not for you to find.

To treat my heart so gently, for it breaks so easily.
In everything that was, there could be no warmth nor light.
It is in my greatest effort I carefully tread through my own confusion.
My thoughts are my greatest strength and weakness.
There is only clarity in solitude.
The only place I can find peace.

Slit icket sönder dig själv kära hjärtanes barn!

Svepande vindar smeker ömt mina lockar till en gyllene storm. Jag är stormen.

                        - Adults are, like, this mess of sadness and phobia.

Emissary

The gravel you planted in my head are stoned to bits, turned to molecules of reclusive ease.

So, me and Für Elise are in cahoots nowadays. Except for the "crying&screaming in ultimate dissatisfaction" bit, we did manage to see eye to eye when singing the nightingale song of frogs. Oh how lovely it would be if that was enough for you as well. 

"Quiet people have the loudest minds"

Sweet mother of all that is holy

Squashing my brain for the sake of  the number jumble. 

In the book of worldly descriptions, 

math should be described as pure shit.

At least for unconventional thinkers like myself.

Particles of the universe

Everything feels like a lifetime.

I'm always the oldest among the withered elderly.

I might have broken everything,

while I was mending the fragile brokenness of it all.

There's no easy way out of the complete darkness of my gory insides.

Staring at my own reflection,

I see only but crouching freckles and the blurriest birthmarks.

Loneliness is the easiest thing when it's the only thing you know.

(Heartbeats)

Allt jag önskar finns i din andnings repetition

Sov så gott du videung. 

Svartemålat över ögon två. 

Nerklubbad under jorden, 

ner till underjorden. 

Jordens skorpa rispar och ristar tills skulderbladen rostar. 

Nu orkar icket den lockiga tösen något mer.

Obelåten tickar tiden, det finns ingen tid längre. 

Inget utrymme för de obekväma. 

Nu är det slut på dragspelets visor, 

jag ska elda upp helvetet.

You're pretty much my most favorite of all time in the history of ever.

        I lost my head on my way to sanity.

   Det ser ut att regna tusenskurar idag.

   Man ska se till att hålla sig över ytspänningen,

   dagar som dessa.

   Olycksaliga saker kan inträffa.

Oh those sweet, sweet tunes

    

     Gettin ready for work.

Snustorra fötter i dyngblött gräs, på med skorna flicka

Trembling movements are approaching from the fog,
hiding and sneaking from far away places.
In backwards speed they are getting closer,
soon they'll be pounding on my back.
I'm afraid of the ache and black bruises they might cause.
Still, the very thought of it causes me to let them in.